Your Thoughts Might Be Tricking You: How to Restructure Negative Beliefs
When was the last time you cheered yourself on? Or responded with gentle kindness after making a mistake? Or shrugged off a mildly awkward social moment?
If you can't remember, you're not alone. Many people move through life with horrible inner critics judging their every move. Who needs enemies when your own thoughts are so malicious?
Negative thinking often fuels mental health issues, and mental health issues can feed negative thoughts. It's a vicious cycle, and it can make you feel more insecure, anxious, and vulnerable to unwanted behavioural patterns.
At Boreal Therapy Collective, we have therapists with years of experience supporting the mental health and wellness of children, teens, adults, and families throughout Fort McMurray and Wood Buffalo. We know that anxiety and intrusive thoughts can be very scary and overwhelming. Fortunately, you can learn to change your thoughts and improve your mindset. Let's get into what you need to know.
How Do Negative Thought Patterns Affect Your Well-Being?
Negative thoughts aren't just an uncomfortable inconvenience. Your thoughts shape your world, and how you perceive yourself directly influences how you feel, act, and make decisions.
Think about it: if you persistently experience negative thoughts, there's a good chance you also experience intensely negative emotions like shame, anger, guilt, or fear. You might try to cope with these emotions in unhealthy ways. In fact, many people struggle with issues like self-harm, eating disorders, substance use, or social withdrawal due to their problematic thinking patterns.
Negative thoughts are also the root of most mood and anxiety disorders. Learning how to change your thoughts can be transformative. Here are some simple ways to get started:
Six Ways to Challenge and Change Negative Thoughts
Negative thinking sometimes serves a functional purpose, but persistently irrational negative thoughts often contribute to chronic stress and low self-esteem. Remember that all sustainable change starts with awareness.
Recognize Your Cognitive Distortions
Cognitive distortions refer to the irrational thoughts we have about ourselves, others, and the world around us. Everyone has cognitive distortions from time to time. But if you consistently believe these negative thought patterns, you may be more prone to anxiety or depression.
Here are some common cognitive distortions:
All-or-nothing thinking: All-or-nothing thinking refers to seeing situations only in extremes. If you didn't get an A on your test, you assume you're a failure. If you have a bad day, you believe nothing good ever happens to you. With this cognitive distortion, there is no gray area and very little room for considering the alternatives.
Jumping to conclusions: Jumping to conclusions refers to assuming you know why something happened, even if you don't have significant evidence supporting your claim. You might, for example, assume that someone doesn't like you because they didn't text you back right away. This assumption negates the possibility that the other person may have been busy or wanted to think about their reply before responding immediately.
"Should" statements: "Should" statements may seem harmless, but they often indicate rigid thought patterns about how you expect either yourself or others to behave. For example, I should have studied more often triggers more guilt and frustration.
Emotional reasoning: Emotional reasoning happens when someone uses their emotions to justify irrational thoughts. For example, if you feel anxious, you might assume you're inherently in danger, even if a real threat doesn't exist. Emotional reasoning often coincides with impulsive behaviours because people may disregard logical decision-making.
Personalization: Personalization refers to assuming that someone else's behaviours or certain events are directly related to you. Personalization often leads to disproportionate feelings of guilt and self-blame.
Practice Cognitive Restructuring
Cognitive restructuring refers to assessing automatic thoughts to determine their validity. We often take negative thoughts at face value and assume they must be true. Cognitive restructuring allows you to check your own irrationalities.
Cognitive restructuring starts by first identifying automatic thoughts. If it's helpful, consider writing them down, as this will allow you to notice specific patterns. Then, ask yourself, What evidence do I have to support this thought? Write your answer down as well.
Think about how you can restructure your negative thoughts into more balanced thoughts. For example, if you tell yourself, I failed this test, so I'm a failure, you might restructure this assumption to, I failed this test, and I'm disappointed, but it doesn't have anything to do with my self-worth. I'll try harder next time.
Cognitive restructuring ideally encourages you to practice more self-compassion and kindness to yourself. Over time, integrating this technique can help you cope with challenging situations better.
Practice Cognitive Reframing
Cognitive reframing is a cognitive-behavioural technique that entails examining negative assumptions and replacing them with more positive thoughts.
You can try cognitive reframing by asking yourself:
Are there any alternative explanations for this situation?
What will I learn from this challenging experience?
Can I identify any silver linings right now?
Allow Yourself to Imagine the Worst Possible Outcome
Although it may seem paradoxical, visualizing the worst outcome may help you feel better. Consistently confronting fears directly creates a desensitization effect.
In addition, imagining a terrible scenario can also help you prepare for potential difficulties in the future. Through this process, you may tap into a deeper sense of resilience and realize you can cope better than you give yourself credit for.
Pretend You're Supporting a Friend
Our inner dialogues can be so critical, and many of us would never talk to our friends the way we talk to ourselves. Although it may seem silly, try to visualize yourself as a dear friend.
What would you tell a friend if they made a mistake? If they were experiencing negative thoughts about a situation, how might you respond? How would you tell them to take care of themselves?
Remember Your Thoughts Don't Have to Determine Your Actions
Thoughts are ultimately subjective, and they can be changed and challenged. That said, it may be helpful to practice sitting with your own thoughts more regularly. As you realize they are just thoughts, they no longer feel so invasive or consuming.
Mindfulness can help you when you feel stressed or feel stuck in negative situations. Try to notice your thoughts and feelings without judgment. Pay attention to what your thoughts might be telling you.
Remember to give yourself space to pause. Within the space between thoughts and behaviours, you have unlimited choice in how you choose to react.
How Therapy Can Help You Challenge Negative Beliefs
There's no doubt that negative or distorted thinking can take a significant toll on your emotional well-being. In therapy, you will learn how to identify cognitive distortions and identify healthier coping skills to manage stressful situations.
You are not the product of your inaccurate beliefs, and you can learn how to interrupt those automatic thoughts before acting on them.
At Boreal Therapy Collective, we specialize in helping children, teens, and adults overcome anxiety, depression, self-harm, and so much more. Whether it be cognitive behavioural therapy, dialectical behavioural therapy, or play-based therapy, we are confident in our ability to support the people of Fort McMurray and Wood Buffalo through in-person or virtual therapy.
If you’re ready to start therapy with us, you can book your initial assessment here.
