Understanding and Reframing Borderline Personality Disorder
Many mental health conditions are misunderstood, and societal stigmas can prevent people from seeking the support they need. These misunderstandings can also perpetuate harmful misconceptions and biases, as is the case with borderline personality disorder (also known as BPD). In this article, we'll discuss borderline personality disorder, its common symptoms, and what loved ones should know.
At Boreal Therapy Collective, we help clients with emotional regulation, distress tolerance, and interpersonal skills. Our practice is rooted in social justice and inclusivity - we embrace a non-pathological approach to offering emotional support and safety to our clients. All symptoms (even the ones that bring you distress) are treated with compassion and care.
Borderline Personality Disorder: A Brief Overview
Borderline personality disorder is a personality disorder characterized by unstable self-image, mood swings, and potentially self-destructive behaviours. It often overlaps with other mental health conditions including depression, anxiety disorders, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), substance misuse, and eating disorders.
While all personality disorders exist on a large spectrum, some of the specific symptoms of BPD include:
low self-worth and persistent feelings of internal emptiness
history of suicidal ideation and self-harming behaviour
tremendous fears of rejection and abandonment
history of intense and unstable relationships
difficulty acknowledging personal accountability in relationships
BPD symptoms tend to first emerge in adolescence or by early adulthood. Professional support can be an invaluable resource in navigating the complexities of this diagnosis.
Myths About Borderline Personality Disorder
Like any mental health condition, borderline personality disorder comes with its own stigma and misconceptions. It's important for individuals and their loved ones to be aware of these myths and their implications.
Here are some common myths about BPD:
There are no good or effective treatment options: While there are no cures for personality disorders, all mental health conditions are treatable. People can and do overcome their BPD symptoms and live meaningful, fulfilling lives. No matter how much you (or a loved one) is struggling, recovery is possible.
BPD is a 'woman's' condition: Research shows that women are more likely to be diagnosed with borderline personality disorder. However, many experts believe that BPD is overlooked in men and that sexism may actually play more of a role in these diagnostic sex differences. Women may show more internalizing behaviours (ruminating thoughts and obsessive thought patterns), whereas men may display more externalizing behaviours like aggression toward others or reckless driving.
You can't have a healthy relationship with someone with BPD: It is absolutely possible to have meaningful relationships. People with BPD often have high levels of empathy and attunement for others. They tend to be emotionally expressive and enjoy giving and receiving love. Regardless of any diagnosis, it's important to anchor yourself to your loved one's strengths and honour their inherent goodness.
People with borderline personality disorder are manipulative: Borderline personality disorder coincides with themes of mistrust and fear. This often drives intense emotions and can relate to dangerous behaviours. However, it's a misconception that people with BPD like or want to engage in these actions. Instead, they often feel desperate to secure a sense of closeness and safety with others. This speaks more to attachment wounding than anything else.
Borderline personality disorder makes people dangerous or reckless: No one condition makes people act in a certain way. Similarly, some people have more quiet presentations of BPD. They may struggle privately without others realizing the extent of what's going on.
Therapy for Borderline Personality Disorder
Borderline personality disorder symptoms can worsen in intensity and frequency without proper care and intervention. If you or a loved one is struggling, professional treatment can help. At Boreal Therapy Collective, we are passionate about destigmatizing mental illness.
Our therapists treat BPD as well as other attachment-related concerns, including complex trauma, developmental trauma, and emotional neglect. No matter how big or scary your emotions feel, you are not alone, and you can experience relief.
If you're looking to get started, contact us here to schedule an initial assessment.
Boreal Therapy Collective provides a review of what to consider when searching for a therapist in Fort McMurray, Alberta. We suggest exploring types of therapy, therapist credentials, direct billing, and personal finances before making any decisions. All information provided is specific to Fort McMurray and the health regulations governing the province of Alberta.
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Separation and divorce is a life-changing event that can be difficult for everyone. It’s important that parents understand what to expect when seeking support for their child. Learn the myths from the facts and the benefits of therapy with Boreal Therapy Collective.
Boreal Therapy Collective offers therapy for co-parenting during high-conflict separation and divorces. This transition can be tumultuous and seeking support can be one of the best decisions you make. Learn how to establish your communication boundaries, let go of ideals, avoid badmouthing the other parent, learn your own parenting style, and more with Boreal Therapy Collective.
Boreal Therapy Collective offers therapy for seasonal depression (seasonal affective disorder). Learn how to cope with the dark and cold gloomy months by getting more time outside, staying connected with friends, prioritizing your physical health, getting consistent sleep, and reaching out for medical support (if needed).
Boreal Therapy Collective offers therapy for coping with breakups and other challenging life transitions. It may be beneficial to seek professional support if you’re struggling with difficult emotions, feeling stuck, experiencing low self-esteem, or engaging in unhealthy behaviours after a relationship ends.
Boreal Therapy Collective offers an overview of depression including the symptoms of depressive disorders, the various types of depressive and mood disorders, the causes of depression, and treatment options for depression, including cognitive behavioural therapy and play-based therapy. We suggest seeking professional support if you or a loved one is struggling with depression.
Boreal Therapy Collective offers eight guidelines to consider when looking for a therapist. We suggest considering your personal preferences, the therapist’s approach, training, registration, credentials, whether they have a protected title, and their affiliation with the Health Professions Act, your personal finances, the hours of operation, and goodness of fit.
Boreal Therapy Collective explains how parents should talk to children, tweens, teens, youth, and young adults about suicide. We suggest having an open dialogue, acknowledge your child’s mental health, ask what your child thinks and knows about suicide, understand the risk factors, refrain from providing immediate solutions or advice, know when to seek professional help, and do not blame yourself. Consider therapy for suicide ideation, including CBT and DBT.
Boreal Therapy Collective explains how children and teens can cope with social anxiety at school. We suggest reviewing the warning signs of social anxiety in school, reviewing and practicing social skills, challenging negative thoughts, imagining positive outcomes, and engaging in small challenges that will make a big impact. Consider therapy for social anxiety, including play-based therapy or cognitive behavioural therapy.
Boreal Therapy Collective explains how parents can better manage power struggles with their teens. We suggest conveying empathy and support, setting your non-negotiable boundaries, picking your battles wisely, staying respectful and calm, being clear with consequences, and praising and validating your teen. If more support is needed, consider family therapy. If you notice your teen is struggling with their mental health, consider cognitive behavioural therapy.
At Boreal Therapy Collective, we are passionate about delivering mental health care that is socially inclusive. To be more socially inclusive, we recommend using respectful and inclusive language, recognizing your biasses, challenging discrimination when you face it, continuing to educate yourself, honouring your growth process, and being mindful of your privilege.
Boreal Therapy Collective explains how to navigate big emotions. We recommend naming how you feel, riding the wave of emotion, expressing the emotion, sharing the emotion, implementing more mindfulness, and considering therapy.
Boreal Therapy Collective explains how children, teens, and adults can cultivate self-compassion. We suggest identifying your patterns of self-judgement, leaning on shared humanity, considering being more neutral with yourself, practicing more mindfulness, taking to yourself as you would a friend, and validating yourself more often.
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Boreal Therapy Collective explains how to understand and release anger. Strategies include accepting your feelings, practice pausing, take a few deep breaths, get physically active, consider creative expression, be patient with yourself, and seek therapy when needed.
Boreal Therapy Collective explains how to challenge negative automatic thoughts. Strategies include recognizing your cognitive distortions, practicing cognitive restructuring and cognitive reframing, allowing yourself to imagine worst case scenarios, pretending that you’re talking to a friend, remembering that thoughts do not dictate actions, and reaching out for therapy if you need support.
